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At Nairobi airport there was the usual gaggle of porters/taxi-drivers/white slave traders etc. By now I had become the Indiana Jones of the corporate world and had won the respect of the natives. They all begged for the honour of driving me to town. I chose one and watched in amazement as he piled my heavy luggage upon his frail shoulders. All the taxis outside were London black cabs. Quite a change from the mobile bedspreads I had been chauffeured around in other African countries. Half an hour later we arrived at the Grand Regency in downtown Nairobi. What a place! Now I've been around, I've seen the world. I've stayed in places you wouldn't believe - hotels, flotels, no-tell motels, even get up and gotels. But this place beat them all. The foyer was like something out of 1001 nights and then there was the atrium - a huge open space flanked by 12 floors on each side and on the far wall a 100 foot high mosaic of a Masai wedding earring. At the other end, 5 glass-sided lifts decorated with tiny lights glided noiselessly up and down like futuristic space capsules. In fact this image was rather shattered the next day when I entered one of the lifts with 5 stewardesses from Gulf Air, rather resplendent in their medieval-style conical hats with veil, together with their combined luggage. We got about half-way up when the lift suddenly gave out under the strain of 5 overnight bags heavily laden with cold creams, airline soap, handcuffs etc. and came to a halt between floors. I picked up the in-capsule phone to reception and was dying to say ”Houston, we have a problem!” but thankfully, once we had jettisoned a couple of barrels of Oil of Ulay and a leather-bound version of' ”How to Join the Five Mile High Club”, the lift started moving again. I came down to the atrium later on to have a drink before dinner. It was all so civilised. A pianist gently playing some background music, a bunch of businessmen discussing the day's affairs at the bar, ladies of ill-repute beckoning to me from almost every table. I sat in the corner and observed the clientele. I hadn't even picked up the drinks card before the waiter was there. ”Do you have any Tusker?”, I enquired of him. ”Oh yes please sir, plenty of Tuskers”, came the excited reply. ”Well keep them to yourself and bring me a gin and tonic”, I quipped. Needless to say, my vain attempt at humour fell on extremely stoney ground and only served to confuse the poor chap (he came back with a Tusker and tonic). And then be asked ”Would you like some bitings sir?”, which rather confused me. ”Bitings…?”, I queried. ”Yes please sir”. ”And exactly who is going to give me these bitings ?”, I ventured. ”Me sir. In a little bowl, to go with your drink”, came the reply. Well, was I relieved ! For a minute there I thought I’d wandered into some secret S & M club by mistake. But just to be on the safe side, I wolfed down my bitings and got outta there PDQ. The next day was Sunday and not an awful lot to do in downtown Nairobi…except of course…SAFARI ! I had booked a one day safari to Lake Nakuru National Park which was about 200 kilometres outside the town. There were five of us inside the mini bus, a Greek couple, 2 Japanese businessmen and myself. A motely crew indeed. It took us almost half an hour to get out of Greater Nairobi. On the edge of town there were a lot of extremely primitive dwellings with thousands of inhabitants just sitting around with no real purpose in life. Many more sat by the roadside all day in the hot sun with a little pile of fruit or vegetables hoping that someone would stop and buy and them. In the end we did manage to see rhinos, hippos giraffes etc. but I'm convinced some of them were cardboard cut-outs as they never moved even when we drove right past thern. No matter they looked real enough on the photos. Mind you, so does Michael Jackson. I didn't have much time to look round Nairobi itself but the one thing that did strike me was the number of policemen around. Dar and Lusaka were almost devoid of fuzz but here they were in abundance. Not only normal cops but also a lot of security guards, vigilantes etc. I'm not sure if this made me feel safer or not. There must have been an awful lot of crime to warrant so many precautions. The one time I did venture out on to the street alone, my colleagues told me to take my watch off and roll up both my sleeves to show that I wasn't wearing one which made me more than a little apprehensive, not to say frustrated. I mean, what's the point in being affluent if you can't flaunt it. I may as well run around naked to show that I'm not wearing designer underwear or stashing any bundles of cash anywhere. And so ended my sojourn in the third world. I only learned afterwards that disaster had been following me around - a boat had sunk in Tanzania while I was there, drowning many people, bombs had gone off at a neighbouring hotel while I was in Lusaka and a British aid worker was shot dead on the street the day after I left Nairobi. Guess I was lucky to get "Out of Africa". Tags for this Travel Tip: hotels taxis cocktails safari safety |
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Comments (4)
2008-02-28 12:21:56
from lioness
wonderful tip/writing.
A very light article here but full of very useful information. Excellent!
Hahaha! Wow! It makes my day perfect. The "bitings" the giraffe cardboard cut outs and all..
But yes, all those experiences make your visit/transaction/business whatever memorable. But the thing is, it wont be as memorable as we have thought/read if it's not you who have written it. Simply amazing write up.. More of this ..more...It really hooks the readers! I have to say.. |
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